Whippersnapper Press: Dedicated to Fresh New Creative Writing
IN 2010 & 2011 this web-publishing site dedicated to fresh new writing from bright young things (or 'Whippersnappers') was alive and frisky with potential. This page's content is a faint memory created from archived pages of the original site.
Who we are
The Whippersnapper Press is a web-publishing site dedicated to fresh new creative writing from bright young things (or ‘Whippersnappers’). The emphasis is on work that’s short, taught, snappy and bratty, or Writing that’s biting. It can be prose, poetry, flash fiction, scripts – or even ‘unidentifiable’ so long as it is still very, very good.
The Whippersnapper Press is an upstart company. It’s like a startup company, but its main goal in a meeting will be sticking kick-me notes on your back. We have no profit margins; we have no profit. We’re here to make some amusement and spread some good writing. “Here, this is cool, check this out.”
The Whippersnapper Press was the brainchild of Editor-in-Chief Hannah Eiseman-Renyard, who works as a writer and editor. While an intern working the slush piles as various publishing houses, she saw some very good writing falling though the cracks simply because it wasn’t easy to market. She decided that there had to be another way, and started daydreaming of a publishing website.
When she found the world of performance poetry she found even more writing that needed sharing, as well as the talented and enthusiastic people who helped make the website happen.
Anyone can submit work to the Whippersnapper Press. The original ‘core’ of people is a loose association of arty-types in the Greater London area, but we’re very friendly and you’re most welcome to come join our gang. If you can make it, come along to our next event and meet us. We won’t bite…
The Oxford English Dictionary definition of ‘whippersnapper’ is ‘a young and inexperienced person considered to be presumptuous or overconfident.’ That’ll do us nicely.
Our attention spans have been ruined by video games, drugs, the internet and hippity-hop music. What’s the result? We like biting at heels and we haven’t got the patience for playing the traditional publishing game which – though lovely – can be very expensive and very slow-moving. If it’s something you like doing: do it now. Upload a link and show your friends.
Pointy teeth, sharp tongues, and writing that’s biting. We blame the parents.
I’ve got some writing for you
Excellent! If you would like to be published on the website then please go to submissions to find out what kinds of things we take, and how to submit.
What is a ‘Whippersnap’?
A Whippersnap is a new idea we’re playing with at the minute. The definition is a piece of writing that’s 150 characters long, or less, (so we’re 10 characters more generous than a tweet).
Whippersnaps are the ‘broken biscuits’ of creative writing, if you will. That amazing couplet you haven’t found the right stanza for; that slogan that would be excellent on a t-shirt, but you’ve run out of fabric paints; that one gem which doesn’t seem to fit anywhere, but you don’t want to abandon.
Arthur Quiller-Couch famously advised writers to “murder your darlings.” Though we advocate wedgies, deadlegs, and most forms of playground violence, we cannot condone murder. As such – don’t murder your darlings – let us adopt them!
I Blame the Parents.
By Anna Freeman
September 18th, 2013
is a shabby academic,
is an ex-Maoist,
for dinner conversations,
or when you want to come out as lesbian –
they are the last people you want
By Pickering, Dave
November 25th, 2010
My past is frozen in Polaroids that flutter through my mind like autumn leaves. My present is the after image of a camera flash. My future is digital.
January 27th, 2011
If you are in London on Saturday 12th of February come to our (belated) launch party.
The Whippersnapper Press Launch Party will be in London on Saturday the 12th of February, Venue TBA.
There will be a Vogon Poetry Slam for Geek Pride Day 2011 (Wednesday May 23rd) venue TBA.
There will be two categories:
- Nerdcore – poetry on a scientific/geeky/nerdy subject
- So-Bad-It’s-Good – rubbish rhymes, angsty subjects, etc.
There will also be:
- Pangalactic gargleblasters to drink
- The most bureaucratic voting system we can devise
- Judges writhing in agony
- Some damn snazzy costumes
Get planning and get writing, peoples!
Use this handy Vogon Poetry Generator to get the ball rolling if you’re not sure what a Vogon poem looks like.
When we tried it out, we got this result (read it and weep):
Vogon Poem Demo
See, see the wry sky
Marvel at its big sweatstained depths.
Tell me, Anil do you
Wonder why the chiuaua ignores you?
Why its foobly stare
makes you feel regretful.
I can tell you, it is
Worried by your gorange facial growth
That looks like
What’s more, it knows
Your mastication potting shed
Smells of an absinthe fairy.
Everything under the big wry sky
Asks why, why do you even bother?
You only charm my feets.
On the So-Bad-It’s-Good front, we’re especially fond of this example of bad poetry becoming comedy gold.
What can we say, folks? It was fabulous. The place was packed, the audience were lovely, the acts were slick, smart, funny, poignant and extremely diverse: we had poetry, prose, and police reports.
This operation runs on strawberry laces and goodwill, so massive thanks to everyone who helped by performing, designing flyers, doing sound, manning the door, recording it for posterity, and all kinds of other errands. We made enough on the door to pay for a year’s hosting, and – best of all – a lot of people got a lot of enjoyment out of brilliant writing.
We were spoilt rotten with the calibre of the acts – both booked and some amazing open mic slots. If you’re having difficulty remembering who did what (it was an absolutely packed bill), or if you missed it, here’s a round-up of the performers we had – and further links should you wish to look up more of their stuff:
Part 1: Booked acts
- Hannah Eiseman-Renyard
- Adam Blampied
- Anil Godigamuwe
- Catherine Brogan
- Grant Howitt
Part 2: Open Mic
- Kyrill Potapov
- Alan Ashton-Smith
- John-Paul O’Neill
- Owen Calvert
- Richard Allen
Part 3: Booked acts
- Mary Hamilton
- Danni Antagonist
- Chris Farnell
- Fay Roberts
- Niall Spooner-Harvey
- Sir Horatio St John Jingo